Spot the signs

Our goal is to end domestic abuse for good.

One way we can help to do this is by educating people on what to look for if you think you are in an abusive relationship. If you feel unsafe or recognise any of the types of behaviour below, then you may be experiencing domestic abuse.

What to look for

Verbal abuse

Do they shout, mock, accuse, name-call or verbally threaten? Are they charming one minute and abusive the next?


Do they persistently put you down in front of other people? Not listen or respond when you talk? Interrupt your telephone calls? Refuse to help with childcare or housework?

Breaking trust

Are they jealous and possessive? Do they lie to you? Withhold information from you? Have other relationships? Break promises and shared agreements?

Control & isolation

Do they control your money? Play mind games and make you doubt your judgment? Tell you what to wear, where you can and cannot go? Prevent you from seeing friends and relatives?


Do they follow you? Check up on you? Open your mail? Repeatedly check to see who has telephoned you? Embarrass you in public?

Threats & fear

Do they use anger and intimidation to frighten and control you? Are you walking on eggshells? Do they break things, punch walls or wield weapons? Threaten to harm you or the children?

Physical abuse

Do they pressure you to have sex when you don’t want to? Do they punch, slap, hit, bite, pinch, kick, pull hair out, push, shove, burn or strangle?


Do they say the abuse doesn’t happen? Say you caused the abusive behaviour? Are gentle and patient in public? Cry and beg for forgiveness? Say it will never happen again?


Have they ever grabbed you by the neck or throat with one or both hands? Held you in a “chokehold” or choked you? Held you up against a wall by your throat? Throttled or strangled you during sex?

Please call us on 08000 198 668, or text us on 07534 617 252 for free and impartial advice. And for those in immediate danger, please call 999.